The long and the short of it

I should blog more often. I have so many things to write about...but the time just flies by. I often wonder is my posts would be too serious, too boring. Well, hey, it's my blog! Anyhow, in the midst of wondering if I should blog about certain personal topics, this verse was waiting for me in my in-box:

"Then I will thank you in front of the great assembly.
I will praise you before all the people."

—Psalm 35:18

I most certainly believe it is important to be transparent about our struggles and victories...how else do we really know the power of the One we serve? Yes, it can leave one vulnerable to others opinions...but in the end, we serve an audience of One, and he deserves to be recognized for his goodness, mercy, compassion, and (fill in the blank).

I have blogged before about our family's "restructuring." This has to do with our decision for me to not return to work. This would be a 60% cut in our family's income. Basically, we would lose money if we had to pay daycare for 2 or if I stayed home, so we opted for option number two. But, we firmly believe that this is what the Lord's will is...and therefore we trust in Him and let him make the difference in our balance sheet.

About a month ago the situation got very dim. Very. Bills were coming in, the expected or hoped for financial help had been cut off, and it was tough to not be cynical. I was doing my best to not lecture the Lord on how it was time for him to open heaven's window and bless our home...to please lead someone to drop a check in our mail box...to somehow give Chris' a big raise...anything. I didn't sleep well for about 3 days (not a good combination). Chris and I were amicable, but the stress was so thick. On a Thursday, we made some big decisions and began working the plan. This included selling my vehicle, cancelling texting (hey - the money goes a long way when buying formula), and cancelling the little monthly donation I make to my beloved OBU. We were going to be under on the sell of my vehicle so we had to try and get a loan for the difference...which our local bank that I use to work for and have been customers of for 12+ years denied us! I read a blog post of a friend that was discussing tithing (very introspective) and I wondered if this was an area of grace (more to come on this). I was suppose to go to the dentist that day, but while sitting in the parking lot waiting for my Dad to get the kids, I broke down - cancelled my dr's appt and drove home totally bewildered at what we were going to do. Thankfully, the kids wanted to nap when we got home. I did too.

My Dad came over that evening and talked with me about an opportunity to open a Farmer's Insurance Agency. We could use part of his tax office and it would give us the flexibility I wanted/needed with the kids. And, eventually Chris would come join the business full-time. So I filled out the basic questionnaire to see what there was to see. I went to bed that night with a zillion questions and concerns, but above them all was this verse, "In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps." Prov. 16:9

That Friday was super sunny, so I decided to get out of the house. The kids and I went to F'ville to meet Mom for lunch. I took a few minutes to work on plan G for paying the difference of the Edge, and it seemed to be working out. I also got some good news about my vesting with the company in August. As I was walking in the P&G building my cell phone rang. It was my HR manager (that I haven't spoken to in months) wanting to know if I could come by that afternoon to talk about my package. I stopped in my tracks. I had signed up to possibly receive a voluntary severance package back in late January. Here, at the end of May, I was stunned! After lunch, I met with the powers that be and they offered me a ridiculous amount of money to NOT return to work! It was all I could do to not break out in praise! But, internally I was for sure!

Seriously. The Lord IS good. Seriously.

I laughed and laughed and laughed when I got out of that meeting. God is so good. Takes care of his children. I was reminded of a sermon Dad just preached about the woman and the jars of oil. The Lord not only met our basic needs (food for kids), but provided an abundance for us to live on. Chris said when I called him with the news it was like a load was lifted off of his chest. In fact, I stopped at Sonic (during Happy Hour) to get celebratory drinks!

That Sunday, during a conversation with a few people after church (and not about our situation at all), a friend commented that "you don't just tithe when you can, you tithe when you can't and let the Lord show up." He has no idea that I had been pondering this exact thing. It was like a light went off. Done. No more discussion.

I've met with the people at Farmer's and am half way thru my licensing process. Chris and I have so been looking forward to this new opportunity for our family. Plus, he'll have so much more time with our family! We received very few (less than 5) inquiries about my vehicle. But, then, my sister-in-law had an unfortunate wreck that totalled her vehicle. On Monday, I was cleaning out the inside getting it ready for her to pick up that afternoon, and the Lord was really speaking to me. Reminding me that he is in control. He orchestrated all of these events and is taking care of us (both our family and my brother's family). We both had needs that we were able to meet for each other. I resolved to do my best to not take for granted how great it is to know that the Lord IS in control...even though his timing and ways are not mine. He doesn't need my approval. Well, let's face it - his ways are better than mine, so we'll leave it at that. But, the Lord and I were having an Ebeneezer moment - reminding me of his faithfulness, goodness, and love.

So, that evening while I was bathing Abi, Chris came home (early) and told me he had lost his job. We were expecting this to happen - but were hoping it wouldn't be until after the new business was up and running. We are at a complete peace. Although there is no income for the moment...we are at peace. There are no hard feelings, no anxieties, no sleepless nights. In fact, I've slept better this week than in a long time.

We began looking at what needs to be done for Chris to get up-to-speed with the insurance stuff...and he will be totally licensed when I am! In fact, we'll take the last set of classes together! This is superb b/c of two huge concerns we had...1)how to manage with 1 vehicle and 2)how to handle the kids when clients come in.

And, yes, Chris did go first thing to the unemployment office. How do you dress for that? (this is funny only to the ones who know the story behind this question) But, you know, we have paid into this for many years, and we are going to use every bit of what is available. And, it appears it isn't much less than his take home pay was! I could write a ton about the face of unemployment...especially now that we are in that boat.

But, I share all of this (if you've made it this far in the post) as a testament of Jesus Christ, my Savior, my Lord, my Redeemer, my Provider, my Shield, and my Portion. He is good. All the time. All the time. He is good.

Join us again for more adventures in the Osmon household!